Friday 7 December 2012

HUMAN HIBERNATION



I was wondering, recently, if we humans actually go into kind of hibernation or something like that.
Not properly, I mean, but I sure have the feeling that I myself and my body and spirit are kind of preparing for hibernation in some very awkward way.


With the temperatures dropping into the minus degrees (-4 currently) I feel my energy and mood dropping with it, accordingly.
Apart from the fact that I am constantly freezing, even with wearing 2 jackets, I have a heavy craving for very warm and very rich and savoury foods.
I feel like a squirrel, trying to conserve as much energy as I can and with the fluctuation of my body temperature my motivation to be active sinks into the minus degrees, alongside the temperature outside.
By the time the clock on the wall says 4pm and the sun has set my body says: “Gosh, gimme a break, lets have snooze…for about 12 hours, please!”
Sometimes, I have a siesta, but waking up after 4 hours I realise this wasn’t a bloody siesta, this was a proper sleep! And the worst is: I really could do with even more!

Now, Hibernation is a state of inactivity and metabolic depression in order to conserve life.
Conserving energy in times when food is scarce and winters are cold is what saves the life of mammals and rodents who fall into hibernation for a certain time, until the climate and environmental changes allow a more active and vivid life with plenty of food.
To do so, they eat more in autumn, store fat and then find a safe place where to fall into a deep sleep which they cannot be woken up from easily.

But I don’t understand my own hibernation issue here at all.
I am human.
My food isn’t scarce.
Co-op and Tesco’s just around the corner and open every day from 7am – 10pm, in order to supply my human fellows and me with any kind of food desired.
And why the heck would I wanna sleep 20 hours every day?
Why would I wanna bury myself in the house next to the fire place, rather than socialise but just stay with myself? How could one possibly to socialise when asleep anyways?
I don’t know WHY this all is, but sure it IS.

I want to sleep, I want to rest and I don’t want to move until its warm outside again.
My energy level is low, my body temperature is dropping and even my mind is resting and not as open and vivid as usual, as you can see with this very post here, where I have to search and cram for words at the very bottom of my word pouch.

I sure have come to the conclusion that I need an absolute different rhythm for the winter months.
A vivid monkey like me…what could I wish for?

20h sleep
2h food
1h grooming
1h spacing out and staring at the ceiling

Sometimes though, its just too bad I am a human being, having to go to work and fulfilling ordinary duties, but being at the mercy of deeper, natural instincts at the same time.

It makes me wonder.
If we all followed our hibernation rhythms, wouldn’t winter be just merely peaceful?

:D




Monday 3 December 2012

FOR or AGAINST all odds?





I currently have thought about fighting a lot.
For some reason, looking back my whole last year now looks like it’s been a battlefield.
Not from the outside, it’s all clean and smooth but rather from the inside.
From inside of me.
And there I am, sitting in a lovely coffee shop; snow is falling outside in big soft flakes and I am wondering, what is fighting actually all about?
Have I been fighting for my dreams?
Have I been fighting for my needs?

And there comes the strangest conclusion I have come to in a loooong time.
Could it be I haven’t been fighting FOR but rather fighting AGAINST something?

Yeah, you should just wait a second and let that sink it, coz I tell you, we are talking about two different pair of shoes here.

To fight FOR something is different to fighting AGAINST something!
It’s about the point of view, the way we are looking at things and this shifts all our energy at every moment.

I tell you what I mean.

Think of something that you would like to do or you would like to have.
Let’s say, you would soooo love to have a new computer. Your old laptop is pretty crap and takes aeons to upload a picture and the system is crashing all the time. It annoys you, so you would soooo much love to have a new one.
Now, you don’t earn that much so you have to save up for the better computer for another 3 months.
Now, just take a second and think about two things and compare the feelings that arouse inside of you.
The first thing I want you to think of is: FOR a new computer!
Can you picture what the new computer looks like? You might have a model already in your mind, which you like. Focus on that and say to yourself: FOR this computer!
FOR this computer!
See how that feels?
Now, try to focus on your shitty computer and all the struggles you have with it.
And then you say: AGAINST this computer!
AGAINST you! AGAINST!
Do you realise the difference of emotions it is creating inside of you?
To me, it does make perfect sense at the moment, because its one of the main things I have been doing wrong the whole last year.
I have been fighting against everything I DIDN’T want, rather than focusing on WHAT I wanted!
And for some reason, I don’t know why, I ended up having all I DIDN’T want! All I have been fighting AGAINST!
Isn’t that crazy? Now I realise, that fighting FOR something creates a very powerful energy and motivation inside of me, underlined by creativity and freedom of fear.
Fighting AGAINST something creates emotions of frustration, fear and a subtle hint of angry tension. This would have never gotten me anywhere near where I wanted to be!
What I was focusing on was, that I DIDN’T want to live in Leeds. I DIDN’T want a 9-5 job! I DIDN’T want the socialisations in PUBs and I also DIDN’T want to live where it’s cold and where I CANNOT go surfing or windsurfing every day.

To find out WHAT I want rather than focusing on what I DON’T want is not an easy task, as most of us haven’t been brought up this way.
But sure, we can learn it and all it takes is just a little self-love, compassion, patience and practise.

I mean, no one ever has learned how to swim just by listening to our trainers’ words, right?

“Gotta jump in and practise,” my trainer told me in the summer camp when I was 8 years old.
So I did…and I won the gold medal in the competition!